Entitlement *

Nesting:
HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF: Eight weeks after moving to the new place, I've emptied all the cardboard boxes in my house and things are hung up on the walls. Making progress and feeling more and more at home. It's a good feeling after being in transition for months. We're getting back into the swing of life in Singapore. (Next week: window coverings!)

Conviction:,
Despite the forward progress in nesting, I did have a moment this week while draining all the moisture out of my body and walking down the street (because we have no car, and I took the wrong bus which dropped me blocks from our apartment), I was walking in the middle of the day in the hot muggy equatorial sun, I found myself saying to myself things I might never say aloud, but I dare write on this blog:

"Damn! I CHOSE this life???
I CHOSE this???
This life sucks! [step, step, squint, step]
Sucks! Sucks! Sucks!....[step, step, squint, step]
God...I don't want to respond this way to my life circumstances.
I want to be positive.
I want to be thankful.
What do you want to say to me in the midst of this?
What am I to learn?" [step, step, squint, step]

"I'm listening..."

And a word popped into my head like handwriting on the wall:

"ENTITLEMENT."

It wasn't judgmental. It was just there. As a fact. My middle-class, American, life of comforts and ease and airconditioners...I BELIEVE I AM ENTITLED to an easier life. It was immediately clear. God wanted me to realize that, though I may have left a better lifestyle , though many of my friends enjoy more comforts, I am not entitled to ease. I realize I am angry that Singaporeans who have it better than their geographical neighbors, don't realize that I have SACRIFICED to make this country my home. But today I am convicted of my sin of assumed Entitlement. Who am I to think I deserve a better life than most of the world's population? Who am I to think I deserve a car, cooler weather, health, safety? Who am I to think I deserve more than the neighbors around me, or as much as the expatriates i mix with through sports or Bible study?

Just because I've had a more cushy life before, why should I assume and feel like I deserve it now? Why? Because, even though I CHOSE THIS LIFE, it's humiliating to think that I might be someone's charity case or community service project. I like being on the giving end of things! It's not quite as pleasant being the needy one.

Anyway, as we've been watching the stock market (and our retirement investments) fall in value, in light of the financial worries of so many of us in the world (who are the "haves"), it was humbling for me to have to face this sin in my heart about the assumption of ENTITLEMENT.

In truth, he doesn't owe me anything; and gave up HEAVEN to walk this earth as a beggar and die a criminal's crucifixion for me.

What am I complaining about?

Lord have mercy on me a sinner.

Update for our Singapore September *(needs photos reloaded)

Hard to believe we' been back in Singapore almost 2 months!


There are so many specific prayers which have been answered in detail. Thank you for praying for us in this transition.
God seems very near to all of us as he paves the way for us to get back to life and ministry in this nation we've been serving since 1999.

Settling Again in Singapore:
We sometimes feel like we're free falling and someone changed the location of the rip cord, but we've come a long way since we arrived July 28th.
Despite the tedious details that come along with setting up family and work/ministry life (our 10th home in 11 years!), we have felt joy from the Lord, a warm welcome back from Singaporeans, and a strong bond as a family.

Our new place,
the night before moving in.

A New Home:
After living in a friend's apartment for three weeks, we found an apartment that met our criteria - especially being in walking distance to the boys' school. We've found that this convenience really improves our quality of life (especially when we don't have a car!). Through several circumstances, we knew God directly answered our prayers in leading us to this place. It is a great location and a pretty apartment. It's also our smallest place since moving to Singapore 9 years ago. But we'll still make room for guests of course! ;-)


Boys in Football #12 and #93:
Tyler and Cameron made the quickest adjustment to life back in Singapore. They really loved their year in the US, and were sad to leave. But the moment they got back to Singapore, they were back with the foods they love, the places they are familiar with, and people they know. They also have more mobility here because of public transportation and safety. They quickly got into their routines at the international school, and we discovered the only American football league in Asia. It's right here in Singapore and we never knew it existed! Tyler is starting quarterback and safety on his team (among 4 high school teams). Cameron is starting center and outside linebacker. They ride the subway one hour each way for weekday afternoon practices, and then we spend the whole day Saturday as a family watching their games and the other teams. Many heard last Spring about Tyler trying to get adopted at Maranatha High School in Pasadena so he could play another football season. Well, both boys are reveling in the unexpected gift from God: we didn't have to leave football behind in USA! Just think! Even in Asia, football can dominate our family life from Mid August until Nov 1st!

CRMS Staff Meeting:
Andy Lim, Shirley Trott, Molly Shoo, & Shoo How Beng

CRMS (Church Resource Ministries, Singapore):
Jim's work is transitioning from mentoring Christian leaders to more organizational leadership for the ministry he founded here. He now has five staff members, and has already interviewed two more since our return. He has started a weekly staff training time and is meeting with staff individually for their growth. He envisions CRM Singapore being a team of gifted mentors that are building spiritual leaders in Singapore and throughout Asia. The ministry also had their annual meeting in August, and are blessed with a veteran CRM couple from Arizona (Bob & Shirley Trott) who are visiting for two months to meet with pastors and Christian leaders for personal mentoring from a wiser, experienced couple, which is really valued here.


CRMS annual meeting with the Trotts attending

The Arts:
Kimberly has quickly transitioned back into teaching drama at a local seminary, and is also teaching drama two days a week in the boys' Christian International school. She loves having a small part in our kids' school lives, and the school children's enthusiasm energizes her as she watches them blossom in their creativity. She's realizing that she loves teaching, but is also praying for the right project to be involved in creating something. She enjoys developing Christian artists' and leaders' perspectives and skills in using drama in ministry, and there's no end of opportunities. She is also catching up with many of the mentoring relationships she has with Christian artists, while keeping food in the fridge and the other things that moms do.

TCA College Students preparing for a performance
at the Asia Pacific Theological Association Gathering, September 2008

Pray with us for:
-Perseverance and good attitudes to finish getting our new apartment and lives "in the groove" and fully functional.
-Continued harmony in our family and favour with others as we look for a new church home where we can all be serving and reconnect with Singaporean friends.
-Wisdom and balance for Kimberly as she manages the home, teaches three times a week, and develops mentoring relationships.
-Godly vision and energy for Jim as he mentors the staff and plans ministry events for the coming months, including the launch of new mentoring networks and a training retreat for CRM's mentors who lead the networks.


Elementary DramaWorkout,
ICS Family Fun Day - Carnival, September 20, 2008

Let us know how we can be praying for you too!

Blessing and joy,

Jim, Kimberly,
Tyler & Cameron

Our new Singapore Address:
356 Clementi Ave 2
#05-277
SINGAPORE 120356

Jim Phone: +65-9839-8559
Kimberly Phone: +65-9839-6965
Tyler Phone: +65-9650-9696
Cameron Phone (home): +65-6504-0884

click on the links!
Family Highlights website
Kimberly's blogs:
Living across cultures
Theatre as ministry


Singapore American School,
SACAC Football League,
Ty's first game under the lights. September 20, 2008

Charitable Giving through CRM USA

On Being Attacked by Nits *

We've had more than the usual share of life challenges coming up with the normal stress of moving and settling in a new neighborhood. Little and not so little. Numerous "this-shouldn't-be-this-hard" types of things come up each week. Breaking small and major appliances, physical injuries, a few things lost or stolen. Oh how the enemy has tried to discourage us and make us give up on being here, but we know we are in a spiritual battle so that helps me keep my chin up to know I'm on the winning side and not just "cursed with bad luck!"

The other day, walking back from the market (I'd had to walk to 4 markets last week to get one important item needed for school), I walked by a store just next to our home that sells Buddhist worship items. I started to feel dizzy! Okay, maybe some would say it's the heat and humidity and ALL THAT WALKING. But I do believe it's also Spiritual. Back in Singapore once again, I have thoughts of my being worthless, life being hopeless, suicide is an option, angry and short tempered... It's not pretty.

It's serious business!

It could be worse. At least it's only the weather and the Devil that's getting me down. A missionary we know in Indonesia was just emergency medivac'd to Singapore -- strange symptoms they couldn't figure out. After running tests here, they found a specific diabetic medicine in his blood stream. HE'D NOT KNOWINGLY INGESTED IT. Someone tried to poison him! He's back to Indonesia now...with his family...carrying on in their ministry. That's more than a broken dryer or smashed in the door finger.

The amazing gift from God is that no matter how chaotic, angry, buried or hopeless the thoughts are in my head, I'm trying to stay POSITIVE. And it's easy to get encouragement. My students in the 3 classes I'm teaching are thrilled (even last night when I left for class and don't realize 'till I'm on the hour bus ride that I left my lesson plans and demo dvds at home!). And my unflappable Jim handles the move, family responsibility and growing ministry with grace.

This past week I met an agnostic South African white woman in her 80's. She's visiting the family of a fairly new Christian woman in my weekly Bible study. God's hand was in it. Over lunch we had a nice chat about her perspective on life, and the Christian worldview that God is good even if the world is full of evil. Her son is not a believer yet, but the whole family attends church. My friend wasn't sure at first to invite her to the Bible Study. I told her, "Just give her the opportunity to say NO." But she said yes, and the study that morning was a disucssion of Romans ch 5...basic Christian theology - what we believe and why. I brought up how much I've enjoyed EPIC by John Eldredge.

Over our first lunch, mother-in-law said her bridge partners back in South Africa are all Christians but she thinks they've given up trying to convert her! I told her I wouldn't think of trying to convert her! "If God and the Holy Spirit are real, and if you are open about that possibility and WANT to know, then GOD will reveal it to you. It's not up to ME! It's just so wonderful to know him, that we want everyone to have what we have and sometimes we Christians get a little too pushy!" The next day I was in a meeting where they had extra copies of EPIC on the table. I called my friend who said, "Mom just mentioned she's looking for something to read while she's here." So I went to her house to have lunch with them 2 days in a row, and passed the book on. We shall see what becomes of it.

Back to building my new IKEA bookshelves (did I write that our former bookshelves are on a shipping boat headed to Dallas Texas? Ha! That's one thing I didn't expect in loaning things out last year.)

More Life. *

Life in Clementi...Settling so far...

This morning, I looked to what in my email box was urgently overdue. I ordered Cameron more football gear from the SACAC office here. What he needed was a new protective mouthpiece 'cause he's lost a tooth since fitting the first one, and tailbone pad because I found out yesterday that this item was missing. Later, upon questioning, I learned that he'd dropped this particular pad on the train the first day he got all the pads. At that point, he didn't have his big sport bag yet. He was juggling all the gear in a plastic shopping bag whose handles had broken while he was walking in the rain! SO PITIFUL. 

Oh yes, and I did a few more loads of laundry. 

(WITH A DRYER THAT WORKS! YEAH! My 3rd dryer in 4 weeks!)

I forked out $14 for the convenience of a taxi to downtown and went to Carrefour to return a toaster oven that didn't work and a vaccuum I decided I didn't want.

Then I spent the next 2 hours and $320 (S) to purchase groceries and household supplies at the same store. They deliver for free if you have over $150. IT IS SO NICE to know the ropes about where to buy things! My heart goes out to the families who are new. It's a rough learning curve whenever one moves to a new city!

Yes, I "Know the ropes." For instance, I know that the big giant store called Carrefour has just about everything you need and a no questions asked return policy. OKAY.... what I didn't know is that you need to return within 15 days…I thought it was 30 days... so had to talk to the manager and beg his mercy for the item that was purchased 26 days ago! I'm so grateful he was merciful! Then I was grateful again that the clerk gave me a cash refund for the item purchased with Jim's credit card! PHEW! I could just see myself trudging back to the apartment with both items: one past the return date, the other because I didn't have the original credit card.

OH I AM SO Thankful for the small things!

Right now, at 3:30 in the afternoon I'm grateful for air conditioning in the hall area. This is the first time we've had that in our 8 years and 4 homes. I'm grateful for a glass of iced tea, and that I've made this outing into town SUCCESSFULLY without getting sweaty or dehydrated - which is partly because the $320 worth of groceries is being delivered and carried up to my apartment by the wonderful Carrefour delivery guy! YEAH!

However, having it delivered also means I have to be home waiting for them and I'm not at school to see Cameron. So my friend Lori Webb's passed an important message on to him. 

As I write, I trust that he is following her instructions and currently looking in his locker for an important Physical Health Exam form he'd had filled out by a doctor a few weeks ago. 

I took him to this doctor the night before the move to get it filled out on time. I just went to any old clinic doctor near where we were staying that week. I'd kept the form in my purse for the next week while moving in, hoping to make a copy of it somewhere along the way, or make a copy of it at home, as soon as we could unpack our printer back and get it up and running. For a few days I'd lost it in the piles. I found it again a week+ ago, in a bag I'd been using to cart the stuff around that didn't fit in my purse. The very next day I had sent it into school with Cameron. 

But the school nurse called today to say that no one in the office knows where it is and Cameron must have it on file to attend school. So, if he doesn't find it, it's back to another unknown doctor in a new neighborhood to get another physical, or he's not allowed to go to school!

This ranks right up there in my THIS IS NOT MY PRIORITY BUT I MUST DO IT ANYWAY files - like spending 7 hours last week to have my photo taken with the faculty for the TCA College's yearbook. I left at 7:30 am to get my hair cut and colored, and borrow a suit jacket (This is required for the photo and I don't own one anymore. I'd only just given mine to the Salvation Army in Pasadena, after not wearing it for 9 years). I arrived at what I thought was on time for the photo, only to realize that 12:45 was the FINISHING time. I jumped into the last of the group photos (completely humiliated) then grabbed a bite to eat before hopping back on a bus to get home by 3:45. Over 8 hours after I'd started, it felt like pointless day.

In all these things, I'm feeling like the earth is falling away beneath my feet as try to get a handle on things and I keep losing or forgetting details. I keep telling myself to enjoy the journey… So i did have a nice chat with the hair dresser, and a nice time catching up with one of the other faculty. I learned of a bus that picks up and drops off only an 8 minute walk from school on one side, and goes right by our place an hour later on the other. Up until today, I'd been going on another route, walking longer and changing from the train to another bus. So finding a direct bus makes for a less stress filled commute!

Another plus is that in all this walking in the muggy weather, I'm quickly shedding the weight I'd put on in USA. At first I thought I'll wait to get a car until I'm back to my target size, and am fit again. But...I'm rethinking that idea. Let's get a car as soon as we can find one!

We're getting settled brick by brick *

"We're getting settled brick by brick," is my mantra of the month.

We're so happy with the place we found in Clementi. It's going to be perfect! It has lovely real wooden floors and it’s very clean.

I'm exhausting myself doing so many, too many things. One is shopping for bookshelves because I found out the ones we left behind here all went to Texas with the family who borrowed them! I wasn’t intending to shop for bookshelves.

I'm hanging on to the hope that by the end of September I'll be in the groove again and will know where I put my keys, the checkbook, my bible, my coffee, my camera, or any of the other items my scattered right brain continually misplaces and can't find among the laundry or piles of boxes and books that had filled that three times larger lovely old apartment we lived in 2007. Now we don't know where it all should go in a cozy 1200 sq ft! We make small steps everyday. Mostly onward and upward, but there are also small downward and backward; like having had two broken clothes dryers in a month. I’m using dryer number three. Another issue is that we have found out someone is using our credit card to purchase things on the internet. Bank of America's phone line seems to be down so we can't put an immediate stop to that. Little things like that.

But the boys, ah the boys are so happy to be playing American football 5 days a week! They found a league here in Singapore up at the American School. They are happily commuting an hour each way on the trains. They come home in the evening and fill my dryer-less apartment with stinky sweaty football gear! Cameron, who only has played flag football before, is loving the chance to tackle other kids wearing pads. Tyler had experienced a tough season last year where his opportunities and ability didn’t live up to his expectations. He’d been thinking for a year now that it was his one and only shot at playing this sport he loves. Now? Now in Singapore, having found this league, he is going to be the Quarterback for his team of 9th-12th graders. He’s already had more time holding the ball in practice than he had all last season.

Out of Crisis Mode and Operational *

Monday when I came home from my 4th week of teaching PERFORMING ARTS IN MINISTRY (at 11PM), I found Jim online shopping for a new computer. The one here seems to have caught too many bugs while we've been away. It won't even turn on, so we'll let you know when we get that 714 number up again.

This week I'm saying, "We're out of crisis mode and operational." However, it's the pace of normal life added to these smaller and unusual breakdowns that are keeping us from getting all the boxes sorted or anything hung on the walls.

Yesterday it was a lost shoe! When I went to put Cam's football bag together so that he could go directly from drama club to football practice, ONE CLEAT was missing. He and tyler both saw a PAIR the night before in the kitchen, so the only thing I can figure is that I must have put it too close to the window to dry out. I walked around downstairs at 11:30PM last night, but couldn't find it. So purchasing a new pair of cleats is on my agenda today! Even though it's tedious to get around; and if you do 2 shopping errands, you have to CARRY your purchases around at the 2nd stop.

BUT. I'm very grateful when something like this happens because I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE TO GO TO GET CLEATS!

I KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN THE DRYER BREAKS, or THE WASHER IS LEAKING, or MY HAIR NEEDS COLORING, or ONE CHILD IS REQUIRED TO GET A TETANUS SHOT, or I NEED TO BORROW A LARGE COOLER WHEN I'M ASSIGNED TO BRING GATORADE FOR THE TEAM.

I keep thinking of the new families I've met at school and grateful I'm over the learning curve of so much of the HOW and WHERE's of living here.

Our next door neighbor came over Sunday night with lotus paste and pumpkin seed mooncakes. Jeanette. From Fairfield Methodist Church where Jim preached once. Daughter 16, Son 15 (haven't even seen them!). We had a nice visit. Her kids are both accomplished pianists and in some "accelerated track" at the Anglo-Chinese School. This is due, I'm sure to no small amount of prodding from their mom. 

These Singaporean homemakers give me an inferiority complex.

MY INTERESTING (that's irony) LIFE. *

The selling of moon cakes at Vivo City, Singapore.

Moon Cakes are only sold this time of year. Take some getting used to ... They are definitely an acquired taste for lotus paste and red bean, and other interesting fillings. They are round cakes (like the full moon of our Chinese Mid-Autumn or Lantern Festival). They are 2"- 3.5" big. The "really good ones" have a duck egg yolk inside! YUM YUM!

Vivo City is the largest mall here in Singapore. It's down at the harbor front where people take the boats to Indonesia's islands of Bintan and Batam, and across from Singapore's little playground: Sentosa Island. This mall was finished our first year while living close to the harbor at Teresaville, so we were down there often. The grocery shopping was great! I could park right next to the exit of a GIANT store on the same floor as the parking lot. Ahh! Convenience! A car and handy parking lot!

Holding THINGS Loosely*

Tyler posted this photo as his Facebook profile picture this week. It's one of my favorite photos of him as a toddler, overlayed with The Dark Knight Joker's face, and his now famous quote, 

"Why so serious?"

This is my theme for the day.

A few years ago, my parents worked on putting together a "missionary house" in USA. They wrote to me about it as they worked on it, and really enjoyed the process, then they had the joy of seeing missionaries from their church get to stay there. I was a bit envious of my parents to be able to do that! Even though I'm the recipient of staying in such an apartment these first few weeks back in Singapore, I like thinking about who will come along next, and imagining the ways the owner who's offered it will be a blessing to them too.

The places we stayed this past year in USA were also missionary apartments. Of course there was some rent involved, but it was quite reduced, and they had a number of rules which helped in keeping up the place and making it nice for the next person who came along. There were some community service things we all signed up for, and a few rules in place which helped in keeping costs down. It still was rather trashy. I joked all year about living in a trailer park, and gave up early on the idea I was going to make the garden planters look nice when I saw the children using the leaves to make "salads" in their play. Nevertheless, there were some guidelines. For instance, when we were getting ready to leave, there was a 6 page document for all the items to clean before leaving. We were told by the manager that if it took a cleaning lady more than 2 hours to finish the list then she would be paid from our cleaning deposit, and we wouldn't be approved to come stay there again! Some thought it was harsh. I thought it was smart.

Especially after being in the Singapore apartment. Yes. part of it is me. Individuals from different cultures or upbringings have different values and standards of how to take care of things and keep them clean. No matter what culture we're from, there are some people who don't value keeping nice things nice. Growing up in a Baptist Church, I remember hearing some ladies talk about not wanting to host a certain missionary family, because they break or ruin things! That's probably what has contributed to my over zealous feelings about this (my husband might call it "obsessive compulsive")!

In the previous post I mentioned the kitchen being filthy and that it drew the critters. This "drama" makes for interesting stories for now, and will be forgotten. I am saddened to see that the previous tenants have not kept the place nicer for this generous owner who lets us stay here FOC. It's not really a hardship for us to hunker down amidst cockroaches. We've lived in challenging places before this, but thinking of this owner's generous heart, and this being Singapore and not China, or Romania, or Peru, I'm sorry to see he's been taken advantage of.

In this case, it's not just his home, but our bedroom set and living room furniture have been here for a year. I had noticed on the first day an inordinate number of scrapes and scratches on the wood furnishings, but didn't get disheartened too much by it. But last night, when the flatmate brought out our bedroom dresser from his room to prepare for the movers coming today, we discovered that a large section of the top has been discolored. I thought I'd prepared myself for some damage or wear or loss, but this is more than I'd mentally bargained for.

Of course we'll roll with it. It's just stuff, and I'm reminded again to let heaven fill my thoughts. In the big picture of life, and the smaller one of living here amongst so many we've come to know and love, there are so many other things to be grateful for. I'll just do a bit of whining here in the blog; like King David did in his Psalms. And also like him, I'll come around in the end to proclaiming God's goodness and my trust in him.

The Nomadic Life of Transitions*

When I started packing our luggage the first week of July, I told myself:

Gear up for 3 months of nomadic life. You're not going to feel this settled again until at least the end of September.

I'll be so glad when we've settled. So many details in moving and starting school at the same time! Finding a place to live being the big one which takes 3 face to face meetings before you actually start to move in. View it. Intent to lease deposit. Sign the papers get the key.

For various reasons there are documents to copy (where do you go to get a copy made in this neighborhood?), money to change (the best rates were a 45 minute taxi ride away), obtaining bus/train passes, setting up phones (which cell phone service actually has the best rates?), electricity, gas, shopping for car, arranging movers, getting a medical check up for Cameron, finding where to buy groceries, signing up for sports, a contract for who'll service the airconditioners, finding a handyman to make minor repairs.

Yesterday afternoon Jim and I met in town for lunch and did 3 errands (only 1 was profitable). Since we don't have a car, it took us FIVE HOURS. UGH. It took and hour to get to where we were meeting. With a car it would have been a 15 minute journey!

I also sent a note to Cameron's teachers today asking for grace on the deadline to get his textbooks covered by Friday. This laborious task is definitely not a priority in the next 2 days!

I rode the public bus with Cameron and Tyler the first day of school and then for the second day, I walked to the bus stop and put them on one I thought looked like was faster. An hour later, Tyler called and said they weren't anywhere near school yet. They got off the bus, found a cab and still were 15 minutes late to school. A TARDY on their second day.

Today, Tyler took off ahead of us, was nowhere to be seen, and Cameron was too nervous to ride alone. I didn't have my phone, and was in my lounge pants I'd slept in, and empty coffee cups in hand (I'd told Jim I was going downstairs to sent the kids off and I'd get us both a 70 cent cup of coffee at the outdoor coffee shop on my way back from the bus stop), but feeling guilty about the day before, Cameron prevailed upon me to ride the bus with him. I got back 1 hour and 10 minutes later at 8:45 and told Jim:

"I'm officially starting my day over from right now."

Got in bed, pulled the covers up over my head and prayed for peace. (actually what I said was, "Into your hands I commit my spirit." but it's evidently not my time to go just yet!)

I'm up again now and ready to start fresh!

Found a New Home

Jim's off today meeting with his first Pastors Network. A welcome back lunch.

I celebrated being back by participating in the 24 hour playwright competition last weekend and cranked out a masterpiece.

The boys found out that there is an American football league and practices start Wednesday.

Just a quick note to say,

Thanks to everyone who prayed, or helped us with leads!

We've found our next "home sweet home" in Singapore!

After only 8 days back in Singapore, we got the keys yesterday and will move in Friday, August 15th. 

Boys starts school Monday, so will only have to commute this first week. 

Most important to us was that it be within out budget and walking distance from school.

Tyler clocked it:

The apartment is a 14 minute walk from the back gate of school.

Our new address is:

Block 356 Clementi Avenue 2 #05-277

Singapore 120356

(We're staying in Bukit Batok West for now, where, of the many small things we are thankful for, there is a TV! 

Which means we can watch some Olympics!)

We're so grateful!

Kimberly, Jim, Tyler & Cameron

Also, our phones are all up and running. 

Jim +65 9839 8559 (same as before)

Kimberly +65 9839 6965 (same as before)

Tyler +65 9650 9696

ALSO: a we have a new USA number which rings on a phone connected to our computer: (714) 982-0578

We're 15 hours AHEAD of West Coast USA. It's easy to figure out! If your in the west coast, whatever time it is there, and add 3 hours. 

If it's day for you, it's night for us. Or simply: Evenings there, are mornings for us. 

Believe God loves to spoil you! 

What are you needing to trust him for today? 

If he wills it, he is able. 

And he is good.

Mini Miracle, Big Blessings while looking for a place to live *

Besides the big one of finding the apartment (story below) there are little things which have been treats from the Lord in our first 9 days:

A new USA phone number through the computer to call home for free, and the line is clear and easy to use.

There is American Football up at the Singapore American School! It's the only league like it for kids in all of Asia! We went up there and met the commissioner and they said they'll put any kids from ICS who sign up on the same team so that we can share the commuting up there 5 days a week. (Conditioning starts this Wednesday and the seasons runs through November 3)

Cameron had only been able to contact one friend since coming back. One of the boys, Ruslan, we'd lost the number for, and the school couldn't find him in their directory either. Then, on an island of more than 4 million, I BUMP INTO HIM and his mom at the mall. He was free to come with me to surprise Cameron back at the apartment. He ended up staying with him all afternoon and evening!

Tyler's best friend from primary school, who is now living in Bangkok, was here the week we came back. The boys had a great chance to catch up and Reuel spent the night with Tyler to have a good long time catching up.

Finding the Next Home

Wednesday, July 30

From day one, we've been in an apartment in Bukit Batok West (near West Mall Up a stop from the Jurong interchange on MRT). Generously offered by the man who is warehousing our stuff, and the apartment where our bedroom furniture and couches are. It was so sweet, in preparing for us he'd partially renovated the bathroom. In it's incomplete state it's been a gift we're grateful for, but not a place we've been able to feel entirely "at home." Not for big reasons, but a number of little things (like eating out at Hawker centers 7 days in a row because we didn't want to buy groceries and cook in the kitchen with all the roaches and the cupboards full of open bags of potato chips and odds and ends of broken appliance parts. Or maybe the piles of junk from the renovation in the hall, or a mould filled cupboard in the boys room that's made Cameron be congested and sneezing)

The other big surprise was that we have two Filipino guys we've never met sharing the flat with us. Nice guys, but it has meant we lock our bedroom doors when not home, and can't be sure whether we can use more than the one shelf in the fridge for all the other stuff in there...

Each morning we've gotten up and walked downstairs to a kopitiam and purchased a coffee and a newspaper to see what's new in the housing market and if there are any deals on cell phones.

Friday, August 1st

In our first 3 days back to Singapore, there wasn't much advertised in the Clementi area, which is walking distance or a short bus from the kids' school. We've said this is our greatest priority since it's our last home before Tyler goes off to university. We want to be convenient for their school friends to come to our house, rather than going somewhere else that's more convenient. It also makes it nice not to have to send them and pick them up everyday after school or spend a lot of time commuting by public transportation!

The hardest part of this housing search is coming to terms with the fact that prices, which were about equal to the high cost of LA rentals, have doubled in the year we've been away. And we know we should get realistic about what we can afford. However, we know that nothing is impossible with God. So, while waiting to see if the Lord would drop an affordable condominium, duplex/terraced house, or landed property in our laps (oh! wouldn't it be nice to have a pool on the grounds again, or -sigh- a patch of garden where we could have a little of our own outdoor space?).
We started looking at the few places in our budget and tried to keep from getting too depressed. If you don't know, or remember, the last place we stayed was a spacious penthouse on the 23 and 24th floor with a breathtaking view of downtown and the ocean! We knew at the time it was an amazing gift from God and might very well be the nicest place we ever live this side of heaven. We had a year in missionary housing this past year to bring us back to reality, but there's still a part of me that knows if He did it once, he can do it again....

On this Friday, nothing was advertised, so we just did some walking around the Clementi neighborhood to check out what the more-in-our-budget, but still too expensive government housing apartments (HDBs) looked like. We figured there are about 75 HDB buildings within walking distance of the school.

In the whole of Clementi, we found ONE that we thought would be perfect.
It was the only block within a few miles around the school which we found having a combination of a number things on our wish list:

• older (so designed with bigger rooms)
• 3 bedrooms
• not surrounded and blocked in by other tall concrete apartments
• away from the loud noises and dirt of traffic or the trains
• pretty grounds and not all concrete
• a quick walk to shopping and a hawker center

Sitting in the common area of the ground floor of this ONE IDEAL BLOCK, I sent a text message to our realtor and said, "Let's start praying for a rental to come available in Block 356." It would be like finding a needle in a haystack since these HDBs are rarely available for rent. And even if she did find something in this one block, the chances that inside would be something we'd like are also kind of slim.

In Ephesians 3:20 Paul prayed, "Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine!" We've prayed this prayer more than once and know that he is able if he wills.

Saturday, August 2nd

I wasn't going to let the housing market dampen my intention to trust that God is going to provide for our needs. He always has, he already knows where we're going to live, and he is not going to let us be homeless! Though I'm dreaming for a garden and convenient pool, Jim says he'd actually prefer an HDB over the condos or anything larger or nicer. It's what we lived in our first 6 years here. He says even if we got a condo on our budget, which is very unlikely, he'd be more comfortable in and HDB because then we're living like 95% of the rest of Singaporeans. He feels it makes him have more common ground with those he serves. I know I can be content in just about anything after our two years in a Chinese dorm and 6 years in HDBs. I'm open to anything that the Lord shows us to be his will for us.

With Jim's encouragement, I went off to join a 24 hour playwright competition hosted by one of the Theatre companies in town. This is something I did 8 years ago - a highlight of our first difficult year here. It was my first time writing a play and I won "Special Mention." Since then I've been studying more, and even teaching playwriting a few times. So, I thought spending 24 hours in some uniquely Singaporean venue, with other Singaporeans who are also writing a play in 24 hours might be a good way to celebrate coming back to Singapore!

Sunday, August 3rd

Sunday afternoon, as the competition was winding down, I was spell checking and formatting my masterpiece, and I got a text from the real estate agent. She had found a rental in block 356, the very block we'd wished for, and we were set to go see it in 2 hours! AMAZING.

I met Jim, the kids, and the realtor at the same common area from 2 days before. She called the owners agent to let him know we were there and he told her he'd just signed an agreement with anther renter the hour before and hadn't called her to cancel our appointment.

Sigh.

Well, she told him, we were already there. She asked him if he'd let us see the place anyway since we'd come all the way down to see it.













The 5th floor apartment had everything on our wish list above and more:

• Space enough for an office/desk for me in the hall area
• air conditioned bedrooms (we hadn't even dared to wish for air con in the hall/living room but this one had it)
• Fridge and washer dryer, but mostly unfurnished (okay, we needed a twin bed and closets - called "wardrobes" which were here)
• a short walk to the public pool, train station, bus interchange and grocery shopping.
• Built in cabinets and flooring in a style we actually like!

We went downstairs after seeing the place. All of us amazed at the timing, how perfect the place seemed, and yet none of us discouraged. God knows and we can trust him.

"Lord," I said my wish and prayer aloud. "If you want us to live here, then you make a way. If this place is meant for us, then let the other deal fall through." We all chuckled at the improbability and suggested a prayer walk around the grounds.

Tuesday, August 5

Tuesday at noon the realtor called again to tell me of a small miracle:

The deal did in fact fall through, and the place is available for us if we'd like it.

How about that?

By 5:00PM yesterday we'd signed the intent to lease, we'd called our movers to get a date, and the wheels are in motion for us to move in August 15th once the owner does some repairs and puts a fresh coat of paint on the place.

The owner even agreed to the last item on our wish list
(one that is rarely agreed to for rentals):

He will allow us to keep a pet!

We had told the boys that when we returned to Singapore we'd get them a dog to replace "Rascal" who died under anesthesia for a tooth extraction the week before we left last year; but only if the landlord allows it. I've been offered TWO Golden Retrievers, but that's not really workable in a small apartment! So, the next installment in this blog will be either how God provides for the dog, or how we find a car...

Back in Singapore: Impressions *

After a year in Los Angeles, we’ve been back in Singapore for 2 days. Like waves upon the shore, or maybe Chinese water torture, I’m reminded of all the things we’ve grown to love here or the idiosyncrasies we find annoying. People are amazingly helpful and kind.



• Three friends picked us up with a truck for our luggage, even though we came in at 11:30 PM. They drive us across the island to our place and take us out for Indian bread called roti prata and the yummy gravy we couldn’t find anywhere in multi-cultural Los Angeles.
• The owner of this apartment renovated the bathroom and purchased new mattresses, sheets and towels for us. The beds were made and looking like a guest house when we got here.
• After being gone a year, I couldn’t remember my bank PIN number when buying stamps at the Post Office and the woman across the counter patiently says, “take your time, you’ll remember.” (I did).
• I have a little trouble buying a train ticket at the automated machine and the woman next to me volunteers to show me how.
• In the neighborhood shops I try out my rusty Chinese and instead of scolding or snickering to themselves about my bad pronunciation or my wrong choice of words (which is what I overheard or witnessed people in USA doing to immigrants), the “uncle” or “auntie” will praise me with some comment about how good my Chinese is (when I know undoubtedly it isn’t).

We are living in limbo until we find an apartment, until we decide if we’ll be able to afford a car, hire a helper, or have a dog.

We are grateful for the offer of a free apartment where our furniture has been stored for free this past year. This meant from the first night back I was sleeping on my own bed. It is a huge gift to stay here, with some familiar surroundings, but still, I don’t know the neighborhood yet, can’t figure out how to use the washing machine, and there are strange odds and ends in all the kitchen cupboards. 

There was also a surprise: we’re sharing the place with 2 Filipino single guys. It may be jet lag, but I feel a bit numb. There is expectation without excitement. After having spent 25 hours last week scrubbing down our missionary housing in Pasadena, I am not sure how much energy I have to clean up here, but I am not comfortable enough to cook at home in these conditions? I wonder how long can we eat every meal out. How soon and how much should I attack the ramshackle kitchen that’s in desperate need of cleaning and renovation when it may send me into depression and there are so many other uplifting activities I could make a priority over scrubbing the greasy burners of an old cooking range? Why do I feel this compulsion to clean?

I’ve told the boys to put their things in drawers. It will help us feel more “at home” even if we have to move out in 2 weeks. The bottom falls out of one drawer. Then we find one cabinet in their room is full of wet books and papers. They are all covered in thick mould from a drippy air conditioner.

Exiting the standard steel elevator of this apartment block, I am also very glad that we are staying on the 6th floor since it only stops at the 6th and 11th storey. 

I walk down a hot concrete corridor, looking out over the groves of high rises painted orange, yellow and beige. I smell a familiar scent. The mixture of incence to ancestors wafting from home altars, mixed with the sour stench of mildew from the wet washed clothes. It had gone a little "off" from sitting in the humidity before getting dried in the blazing sun. 

I smell what I think is the stale and dusty cooking grease coating every kitchen. I’m wishing that this aroma give me a warm fuzzy feeling about being back. 

I want to have the old “home sweet home” feeling after investing 8 years of my life here. 

But it doesn’t, and I don't.

However, I am walking beside Tyler (15) and Cameron (11) and I watch them take it in. I know that their reactions to all of this are happily and completely different from mine. To them this constant sticky sweaty feel, and the hum of fans, and escaping to an air conditioned bedroom is familiar. These dark security bars across all of the apartment windows seems normal. Instead of these bars making it feel a bit like a prison, like it does for me, it adds to everything that is making the boys happy to return.

Qualities of an Excellent Woman *

Summer Reading for 10th Grade Honors English.

As I did last summer with Lord of the Flies, I'm sharing Tyler's burden of wading through the verbose Victorian text of his assigned summer reading. There are so many good books I missed when I was in school, I find it a good way to share in his life, and build my own cultural literacy.

But I'm also being mentored by fictional characters.

I didn't catch this important list and learn from this description of a young Nancy Lammeter when I first read Silas Marner in 10th Grade.

1. High veracity
2. Delicate honor
3. Deference to others
4. Refined Personal habits

A description of this woman in part 2 as she sat to read her Bible jumped out and bit me too:

She was not theologically instructed enough to discern very clearly the relation between the sacred documents of the past which she opened without method, and her own obscure simple life; but the spirit of rectitude, and the sense of responsibility for the effect of her conduct on others, which were strong elements in Nancy's character, had made it a habit with her to scrutinize her past feelings and actions with self-questioning solicitude.

Still, why a teacher would choose this particular book to burden any modern 15 year old with over summer is beyond me! I am enjoying the story as a nice diversion to packing & moving, even though I find the text tedious. When there are so many classic books not requiring such concentrated mental effort to decipher the author's meanings, I'd wish the teacher had assigned something different for these days of summer when there are so many distractions to keep a kid from knuckling down with a Victorian novel!

Reality Check: Housing Options

We're returning to Singapore later this month and my realtor has sent me photos of the only option she can find in our budget that is walking distance from the kids' school (Oh, my...this is kinda depressing! We're going to keep looking).

I was looking at these photos above of kitchen cabinets whose colors only belong in a 50/50 ice cream bar, while staying in a luxury cabin with my family in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Georgia. Above are photos of the housing option in Clementi neighborhood of Singapore, and below is where I was sitting when I was looking at the emailed photos.

But it could be worse! Below that is pictures from a visit to where our friend Loonni lives (a village in rural Thailand).

11 YEARS a Photo History of July Highlights

For the last 11 years,

what we were doing in the month of July

July 1997 

We were briefly living among Chinese immigrants in Monterey Park,

preparing for our move to China.

July 1998

We'd lived 10 months in Kunming, China studying language & culture

having loads of opportunities for sharing good new

while preparing for long term in Singapore.

July 2000

We'd finished our first half year living in Singapore.

Kimberly participated in a 24 hour playwright competition,

wrote an award winning play & sang for Children's Day.

July 2001

Jim was coordinating one of the conferences for building ministry partnerships for China

July 2002

Our friends from a Marriage Mentoring small group prepare for long term move to China.

CRM First Pastor's Network goes on their first retreat.

CRM Singapore's first Executive Committee

July 2003

Outreach to Thai workers living in Singapore.

We all were finally feeling settled and thriving.

July 2004

First CRMS Pastor's Mentoring Network - Facilitator Training

"Five Stars" Actors Mentoring Group celebrate a birthday.

July 2005

Jim stays behind in China for the summer, Kim and kids spend time on both coasts for reunions and time with grandparents & friends.

July 2006

After a full year of expanding ministry, we found ourselves back in California again, namely Santa Barbara for the CRM worldwide conference.

Tyler went to DC with grandparents. Cameron met his birth family. We all scouted out Pasadena praying for wisdom for 2007-08.

July 2007

We started our year back in USA by driving across 12 states in 10 days. Here is Sgt. Light Brown on his US tour.

July 2008

Tyler's last football practice, the Maranatha High School Football JV team prays for him and gives a cheer for Singapore.

We Praise You God for guiding, providing, and protecting in these many Julys (and the other 11 months each year too).

We humbly ask for your wisdom & will to be done in our lives as we continue to live for & follow you.

AMEN.