Though this letter is so personal, I dared to post it up here because it's been so meaningful for her, that I want to encourage others to start this tradition. I'm grateful to be back in the USA after so many years in Asia in order to have this time with my folks.
May 8, 2016
Happy Mother’s Day Mom!
Here is your third annual letter of random memories and tons of thanks! I’m so glad to have you
as my mom. This past year, since last Mother’s Day has probably been the year with more
accomplishments than any other year of our lives:
- Cameron’s High School Graduation in
- Tennessee
- Tyler’s College Graduation & ROTC
- Officer Commissioning at Cal Poly
- A party to send Cameron off to Liberty
- with blessings of his adult mentors –
- mostly your friends
- Our trip to Yosemite to celebrate your
- Anniversary
- Tyler’s Infantry Officer Graduation &
- RANGER School Graduation in
- Columbus Georgia
We’ve had sadness too in walking with
Howard through his last days, Kathy
Ramirez return of cancer, and trying from a
distance to support another family member as he had difficulty at Riverside Military and transitioning into a
suitable High School. And you continuing the journey of coping with your brain not cooperating.
You’ve always taken pride in that sharp mind, skilled planning and ability to organize. In these
recent years you’ve wrestled with losing those abilities and have been forced to find your
identity as a beloved child of God, a beloved wife and mother, a brave and gracious patient
with a sassy sense of humor. You keep surrendering to this new normal -- no matter what you
can and can no longer do. You have been so brave.
These last few weeks we’ve been organizing your closets filled with the fruits of one of your
favorite hobbies: clothes shopping. It’s been fun for me to see all the clothes you have! It’s like
going to a clothing shop. While we purge out what is clearly too large for your thinner body, and
put matching outfits of separates together, I’m reminded again of growing up and having a
mom who was always more fashionable than I was. The strange thing is, what stands out in my
mind as an example of that is that you had some Van’s slip-on jungle print tennis shoes before
anyone knew of the new slip-on design!
You are not the Anne Taylor/Talbots kind of conservative professional. You were not even LL
Bean or Patagonia sporty -- wearing collared blouses and slacks and looking like everyone
else. When you weren’t in your PE teacher uniform, your clothes were trendy and feminine! I
think this recent era lace, crochet and peasant layers has been your favorite. That’s the time
when it dawned on me: for all your praise of my creativity, I got my “artsy” from you!
You may not have owned up to the fact that you were a creative, but you were. In your cooking
and sewing and decorating and favorite musicians you were creative. They were always ones
you could easily sing along to. Your creativity was so evident.
You learned how to play guitar and would have me sing with you at the Gamble/Ralls
Christmas Eve gathering. Alfred Burt carols have always been my favorites since you taught
them to me back then.
Long years ago on a deep winter’s night
High in the heavens a star shown bright
While in a manger a wee baby lay
Sweetly asleep on a bed of hay…
You may not have been into pop music or wanted us to go to school dances (we were good
Baptists) but FOLK DANCING was okay. You loved teaching folk dancing as part of your PE
curriculum. The Filipino dance with the bamboo poles “tininkling,” square dancing… and of
course drill team routines.
You’ve been a good balance of organized/controlled with fun loving/free. Well, maybe more on
the controlled side. But as I reflect on life growing up with you as a mom, and have read and
learned of what childhood was like for others, you were AMAZING! You kept our daily life and
family calendar organized and humming along with rarely a sense of hurry or stress (oh how I
remember your long packing lists for Camping, or planning lists for prepping a party!) YET you
were not frantic or crabby by the challenges of family life in the fast lane. You’ve laughed and
enjoyed life and took time to watch a bit of TV, bake, sew, and be the scorekeeper at little
league games (BTW: If you had raised me in this era, you would have known by my inability to
learn to keep score at those games that I was ADD. You tried to get me to do it, but I could
NEVER stay focused enough to not miss all those details of hits, runs & errors! You, however,
saw and remembered EVERY play!)
That’s why I know this season of your brain not working well has to be especially frustrating,
and I grieve with you this gradual loss you have been living with. What I admire so much about
you right now is that while I’m sure you have your times of sorrow, you are choosing to stay
cheerful, loving and keep your sense of humor. I see you choosing to focus on gratitude for
what you do have: lots of love, respect and affection from your family and the many people you
have invested in over the years; PLUS the security of knowing your true identity in Jesus
Christ, and how dear you are to our Heavenly Father who has promised his care and provision.
You are my hero Mom. You always will be.
Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
No comments:
Post a Comment