I blow it with my kids all the time. But there is something I do with my kids that is very rewarding and a lot of Christian parents haven't made this a regular part of their parenting and it's easy to do: bedtime prayers.
Each night that I'm home at bedtime, my husband, James or I (or both of us), will pray with our boys at their bedside. Sometimes we'll all pile on their beds together. Over the years, it's been a sweet family time. It's also been a place where I think my kids get to hear my heart in a way that doesn't take place over meals, homework, chores, or errands or lessons.
On days when I've not really been a "victorious Christian mother," and if I've been convicted about it, this snuggle time is also a time when I confess to the Lord where I've blown it as a parent and my children are listening in (adding "AMEN!" just kidding!!) Sometimes I pray for the child's emotional healing if I've said harsh words that cannot be taken back. I speak of my thankfulness for the child's positive qualities, listing them, as a blessing on them. Most times I thank God that he never blows it, is always patient and is always a perfect judge, or knows the right answer. He, not I, is the perfect parent. I always, thank God for letting me be their mom even if I make mistakes, and ask Him to use my being their mom to mold my character and make me more and more righteous and good.
Regular bedtime prayers is an easy place to fall into "Christianese" (jargon) and let the prayers become "rote." So, I purposely don't pray the same thing all the time (thank goodness I don't have to have major confessions everyday!). Sometimes I'll even let the kids in on my questions of God, and how I don't understand the hows and whys of suffering, or poverty, or or or. I believe it's freeing for both me and my kids to have me admit that I'm not perfect and that I have questions.
I think this is part of the reason my kids really open up during this bedtime ritual. Sometimes I get to hear things that are on their hearts that they wouldn't ordinarily share. Because they open their hearts to the Lord in my presence, I can then pray for them other times knowing what's on their deep heart.
My boys are 13 and 9. I wonder if there will ever be a point when they don't want to pray with us at bedtime, or will become rebellious and sullen through the day and unwilling to confess their sinful attitudes at night. I might be able to make them apologize to another person, but I can't force them to do it with the LORD! For now, it's the highlight of being a parent for me.
Cameron, my 9 year old tells me nearly every day that he "can't sleep without the prayers or your sweet kiss." Tyler, now 13 years old, won't always tell me when he's going to bed, and I lose track of time sometimes; but he seems to still love it when I remember.
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